Things That Are Technically Not Cheating

He is listed as 12. His birth certificate says 12. He is 5'9” with a visible mustache. His voice is deeper than the PA announcer. He hit a ball over the fence in warm-ups and nobody on his team reacted because this is apparently normal. You check the roster three times. You look at the parents to see if anyone else is concerned. Nobody is concerned. You let it go because what are you going to do — ask for a dental X-ray?

Someone on the other team has a bat that sounds different. Every ball that touches it leaves at a velocity that suggests the bat was manufactured by NASA. Three parents on your side have already Googled the model. One has checked the USSSA approved list. The bat is technically approved. It just happens to sound like a cannon. Technically legal. Spiritually unfair.

The other team's parent is umping bases in pool play because they were short an official. He will make every close call for the visiting team because he is a good person with integrity. This lasts until the third inning when his son is called out stealing second and suddenly the tag was “clearly high.” He is trying. He is failing. This is why we need real umpires.

Down by 6 in the last inning of pool play and the coach pulls the starters. Not to rest them — to manage run differential for tiebreaker purposes. This is legal. This is smart. This is also deeply annoying to the other team that is trying to build momentum. The coach will deny it. Everyone knows. Nobody can prove it. Welcome to travel ball game theory.

The home team is keeping the official book. Their scorer has a generous interpretation of “error” vs “hit.” Every ground ball that gets through is a hit for their kids. Every ball that your kid puts in play is an error by the fielder. By the fifth inning their team is batting .800 on paper. Nobody questions the book because nobody wants to be that parent. The stats will be posted on GameChanger and entered into the permanent record where they will mean absolutely nothing.

The other team's pitcher has thrown 84 pitches in a 75-pitch league. Their coach says it's 72. Your assistant coach has been counting. The umpire does not count pitches. There is no official pitch counter. It is your word against theirs and the game is close and nobody wants to be the one who stops a game over a pitch count dispute at 10U. The pitcher throws two more innings. Everyone pretends this is fine.

Your team's game is on Field 3. The other team is warming up on Field 3 even though your team has the field for pre-game. When asked to move, they take an additional seven minutes of ground balls while nodding and saying “yep, wrapping up.” They are not wrapping up. They are taking infield. This is a power move. Your coach will remember this. It will fuel a level of competitive intensity that is wildly disproportionate to an 8 AM pool play game.